Flying without wingzz

just nohting at all...

2009-11-20T22:17:00.000-08:00

exam just around the corner , gambate^^

just ignore the surroundings .

stay focus.

1 month holiday , no need to think , no need to see , no need to study after this...

dat's it~!!!!

leave here as soon as possible~!!!!!!

i m...sorry

2009-11-20T22:02:00.000-08:00

Recently , feels lonely...that feeling grows more stronger day by day.

i dint mean treat u like that...just , i cant help myself.

i just dont like noise.that's it.

after leaving , looking at that building , i strongly believe , i m not liking here at all.

nothing makes me to have nice memory bout here.

only study , study and study. i m a robot here.no expression , no feeling , nothing.

the only i can do , just pretending i m ok. actually i m not ok at all.too confident bout myself.

but the thing that i can do , keep all the loneliness , hurtful , unhappy lock inside into the deepest in my heart. no1 can open my heart anymore.

my heart , only continue pumping blood throughout my body. but no soul at all.

i just cant believe , it's hard to believe.that's it.just u all know. i m not among urs...

i m just only bypass.
after 5 years , game over.

when everyone thought i m pity , yet i m no feeling at all.
nothing to pity.
since small i get used to it.
everyday , every hour , every second .....alone.
eating alone , drink alone , do things alone , suffer alone.
liking being alone? ..no , just get used.

not hoping others to undersstand , just leave me alone.

isaw the eyes...looking diiferent into her eyes.
and i already know....
bless u from far place.
wont disturb u anymore.
just what u thought bout me is weird , at least u have some pieces of me in your mind.

no1 to talk , talk to myself.
nothing to do , study , watch drama , listen to songs.
no1 accompany , God always be there for me.
no1 thought bout me , God always be with me.
i wont be afraid to this lonely journey.
just wait....just wait my accomplishment, dat's the time i go.

when the times i go , i wont be regret anymore.memory bout here in this world nomore.

nothing to worry, i ll becum bravier , not u thought me is a weak.i can do by myself , no need anybody help me.

5 years , faster.
after this , it's over.

nEw mE^^

2009-09-23T03:00:00.000-07:00

RECHARGED FULL : happy^^

this holiday too many happy memories~~enuf for me to be happy at least can be persist for whole month or maybe 2 month??haha

luvin with my frends outside there~
especially ah ting~~luv u~wakakakakaka

thanks for understanding me ,
only u know me most.
from the surface to the deep in my heart
feels so good to be with u
dedicate one song for u : 一个像夏天一个像秋天

u r the summer and i m the autumn..

after sharing a lot with my studies , love life , social life and a lots~~
now i know wat mistakes , wat steps shud i take , wat decision i made is great , wat is the decision is funny yet good , haha~

thanks a lot^^

sometimes wonder if that i could know what the people think about me,
but now ,
it's not important anymore.
coz i know , i m only human ,
i m only normal human.

can be happy , can be sad , can cry , can smile , can be angry ,can be not satisfy , can be ...more and more~~

fuhhh~

u asked lots of times : why dun wan have a boyfriend?

dat time , i keep laughing.

now , i figured out the reason.

not dun wan , i shud correct my sentence , i shud say actually i m not thinking about it.
dunno y , i still dint think about it.

i luv myself ,
i luv to be alone ,
just enjoy my life alone.
feels weird , my life soo long time , been alone for long time , suddenly a guy "disturb" my life.
weird.
argh~!!!!! just cant accept it.

i just wanna step by step . at least shud start from frens^^

be true,ann

new problem???

2009-09-15T01:07:00.000-07:00

1st of all~~i posted the 3 bitches in my blog~~wahahahaha.

if the person who read this( my lovely blog, thx afterall)

if terasa salah kpd say , insaf lar~

i was asked by others , why i m sooo strict to myself y always "no life"???

coz i dun want waste my time on it.dat's all ,

coz i prefer sleep than go out social everytime and do some silly things everytime.

i m enjoying my life~watch cartoon , read my pathology~lepak my housemate room~dat's all.

wakakakakakaka~sometimes i feels very paiseh wanna disturb others coz ...not really close.

i think i m have common characteristic with someone but yet i m not him/her.

i m me, just simple,ann~^^

blur blur , sort sort , read books at anytime , if i "motivated",wahahahaha~

my expression sometimes makes other thought i m angry, sad or have problems~

actually sometimes i feel down...

feel not appreciated.

been ignored.

but.that it's fine.

that's y and how i adapted to enjoy myself and no need to think bout others~

i treat nice to the ppl treat me nice. and vice versa.

somebody already know bout my weakness but yet i oso know too hers/his.

so y dont both of us peace????

settled~!!!!

2009-09-15T00:55:00.000-07:00

last time had a misunderstanding between u and u and me~~~

huh~i pushed myself to become confident and straight to the point~

i asked ~did something wrong between us??

she said , it is a misundestanding,it's ok~

i get it, and i know~dat moment we r still fren.

huh~made me nervous~gal

at least there is nothing makes me feels weird when talking to u~~
wahahahaha~

and another thing~one gal~

wat happen to u ???
y u becum ....not the one i know anymore or i shud say i not know u at all ~????

did i done something wrong??

or .....misunderstanding again????

what happen???or u thought??....

thought me ...with a person i shudnt??

y?we r frens not more than that~

frens~just fren~he oso dont want me and him becum more than that.
wahahahaha~

just unfortunately when u and other saw me and other guys went together , thinking the other thing~~~

why gal and boy cant be just fren not more than that???hating~!!!!!!

i already mention , if one really like another y dont u tell straight forward, seems difficult but y dun wan give a try?at least and lastly u and another one still can be her/his fren.

...hish~~~even though i m not experience but i heard a lots of stories~
geram~!!!!

....(sabar-ing)...lol.....

everytime , me only one kena hantam by others~...
u already shown that u really dun like me~wateva.
i know i cant satisfy everyone.
so , up to u if u still wanna be my fren.

sorry for all of udm medic sutdent~last day gathering i m soooo happy and not enjoying at all.coz for one reason :
tired.

everytime my expression looks down or sad~nothing, just tiring.dat's all.
even i m really sad , also like dat, so wat? u not know me for long time. so dun just comment other when u dunno such person so well~^^ok?

huhu~~it's raingi during cla.wanna go bec home for raya holiday.
hopefully i can recharge back soon~!!!wahahahahaha

tiring of this medical student life~although i had tried to be fun~

2009-09-11T18:34:00.000-07:00

tiring although i m enjoyed it a lot
feels exhautsted ~

today hae a slight fever, duno y~bacterial infection? or just one of symptom from bff leaving me??

took panadol and slept...woke up at 4~

almost reach the time go bazaar.
haha , just hope the fasting month get over soon~

lazy to walk out everyday to buy food at far places.

hate...???ya.~!!!!!

2009-09-07T04:32:00.000-07:00

recently ...many things happened around me.
makes me feels ...down???no...sad??? no...
disappointed and......feels wanna give up in this relationship.

duno y...this feeling grow more as day goes by.
i asked myself , did i done the same mistake again??
the answer : ya.

i fall in the trap yet i quickly pull out myself from the trap.
consequence : start to pretend i m ok ,just like now.
haiz , i cant trust u anymore...

sorry , really disappointed .
u really a bitch~yet i impressed u such a bitch can act so well in front of ppl~
i m becum the scapegoat.

never mind , i just keep my mouth shut , and just stare at u~
i wana c how long u can withstand it , bitch.

really sucks~~bullshit~!!!!
....lol
rude , but i dun care anymore~~!!!!

i really now dint like u ~
3 bitches in the group , really match ah~^^'''
i will becum strong , i wont give up to beat u , sorry , i wont.
hahahaha~

y wana becum like this???
i trust u , then y ??? y u wana betray me???
did i m the one done the mistake~???
no.
not me.

i asked myself
i dint do anything that hurt u , yet ...u betray me.
haha

so easy to fools a ppl. in front of me , u pretend~
back there like a bitch
~shit~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

GAIN IT BACK

2009-09-03T09:08:00.000-07:00

Last two weeks , i lost myself~~

cant found the real reason why i really wana becum a medical student~~~lol
can i quit???
no.

i wont quit.
i wont quit.

wakakakakaka~~(too tension)

now the situation the place is not conducsinve enuf to study~

huh , at least now got the hall~~everyday go there study~.dun wan stay in house , malas to layan them~

if i really cant control myself now , i duno wat will happen in these 5 years ah~

is it i m the wrong side??? just wanna more rest...study is sucks now yet housemate keep making noise.

i ady told plz lower down their voice yet~~more noisy
feels like wana runtuhkan this house~

i cant tahan...coz later if no understanding between each other , later sure got fight.
i just dun like to fight. really suck ah~!!!!!

feels wanna slap and bite people now~~yet , still wana control my temper.
speak frankly , i m changing a lot , if me in past ,meletup ady~!!!!

if terasa tu , sedar and insaf la~
wakaakakaka , i prefer like this.

i dun care u r wat race but plz la~~budi bahasa tu jaga sikit~~

huh~i m considering enuf for u all but wat happen now????go hell la~dun wan anymore i m the one keep tolerance...

now chaged ady , start the feeling wanna study lor , this week oso dint go to church...haiz.sorry , i really have spent a lot of time to study lor~~~hopefully next week can go before i go back to johor^^

frankly speaking~~

2009-09-03T08:57:00.000-07:00

now i m tension -ing~~

study not yet~
housemate veryy bising ah~!!!!
dah complaint pun like dat~~
tak faham langsung and not understanding ...umur dah berapa???!!!!

huh~~really angry ~~~wat the fish!!!!

still control my anger~be patient , ann, they dun wan study is their own matter , and really dint bother u r not same course with me , the thing is please understand other wan rest , does nt mean the person have follow u all do crazy things everyday~~lol

slam door till wana ruin the door , laugh like pontianak~huh~
maintain ur image a bit la~
kesian~

as a girl , sopan la sikit~!!!
....

now i m complaning on here,wakakaka~never mind la~
they oso cant deny it~they are really sucks~!!!

not hating~just fed up by their attitude~~

just pulled out my headphone , play the music as my revenge~
later midnite i just on like this ~~huhu~~

wakakakaka...(sort liao)~~

Shit~!!!!

2009-09-02T08:21:00.000-07:00

now i m really angry~!!!!

calm down....stay peace , ann ^^

this week really sucks enuf!!!!

everythings is went wrong , nothing is pleasent~~

exam result.....relationship....frenship...haiz

everything becum complicated~~i hate these kind of things~~

wateva , just sleep la~~hopefully tomorow will becum ok^^

tiring~~

2009-09-02T07:54:00.000-07:00

1st of all...1 word : tired.

not only body and mind.

i m the kind of lazy person...or i shud say too " wong xing wo su"?

half half kot , haha^^

i m lazy to explain things even i know it is not gud if the things keep goin then the situation becum worse.

too many unpleasent things happened within few weeks~

why people like to judge people without askin the truth 1st???

seems like i have to improve my communication skills lor~~lol

comunication is really damn important ler~~

apologise to those who been hurted by my harsh word if i told before , although i dint find any wrong wor~~
i try my best to change if i can change^^

the thing u mention "hmm"...

i really cant understand u at all. u told me like dat , wat i heard from others is different...
if really x puas hati , tell directly ok~~!!!!

although i know not everybody will tell u about ur mistakes~

i duno wat is the main problem??? even i try so hard try to understand u , the thing is wat i know from my judgement , u seems really bu shuang me~~

wateva , i dun care anymore , if really bu shuang , i prefer "pretend to" to becum ur fren , coz i dun wan do so "ming xian " dat we got problem wif each other , ok?

in TERENGGANU~!!!!

2009-08-18T20:54:00.000-07:00

OOO~finally decided entered UDM...it is in terengganu~~i felt very nervous during my journey..coz i never step into terengganu if i m not decided to cum here study for MBBS~~
thx God , parents , family members , pastor Doding and frens who are give me a lot of moral support in making decision~~

still remember dat nite , i cried when i know the result from ipta~~
tears falls on my cheek , 1 of the reason i s happy coz i bcum one if MBBS student in malaysia^^
2nd is ....scare and anxiety ...coz lots of my frens ..they are goin to UM , UKM ,USM~~i m d only one "terbuang" in TErengganu~!!!! omg~~~

haiz~~but never mind , it wont be the reason to stopping me from learning throughout of my life~~
still remeber my lovely dean said :" being a medical student is a life long learning~doctor shud be humble and patient~"

the fears growing when i 1stly entered the main campus~~`

huh~!!!
i m really culture shock here~!!!
the food , the way people act , the messy stuffs~~fuh~have to take quite long time for me adapt it^^

during the orientation week~~i met a lot of peopl~and i join ed the qiors~~omg~1st time singing in front of bunches of people~`even i m not singing alone~~still quite anxious but fun!!!

know a lots of people~~makes lots of frens and now~~met my coursemate , lecturers and more~(etc , etc, etc)

lots of things occured during this time , the sadness , happiness and the craziest things i had done~~~in Terengganu~haha

but the thing i dunt like till now i also cant accept it is~~~~no food~!!!especially on friday~arghh~~~

Win again~~

2009-06-21T09:47:00.000-07:00

upu released , and i got my 3rd choice---udm(terengganu) , medic , mbbs.

when i post it on my facebook wall , everybody keep asking "where is it???"

then , i m wondering why everyone dunno bout this thing?

coz it only open for matrik student for certain course. eg medic n dietician.

it only starts from this year.maybe due to this reason , so not so many ppl got same course with me.

my coursemate is my jmc ketua mentee **

my unimate is my practicummate's roomate,haha

till now , i just have these information.

goodluck for those entering university be well prepared , ready for the next chapter of our lives , cheers~!!!

no matter how far we are , our heart are always be connected to each others^^

Battle??? ok, i accept your challenge

2009-06-16T05:47:00.000-07:00

one day, i heard (actually i was overheared,haha)

my "lovely" cousin (when saw this , you should know what i feel about it)

was called my dad.

no other things , just as usual , "asking" whether we are fine here or not.

actually pretending to be.

poor of her, always like that.

i m not too good in relaionship between far relatives , but this one gives me a big headache.

i wont ruin her name here , because this is not a gentleman....erm well , as a "gentlewoman" act ,haha.

just feel a bit , exhausted.

everytime , the same thing happen , the same mistake i had made , same situation i had to met.

but at least , i din't lose , once.

everything have to be compare , is it nice or something good for one keep comparing with others??didn't feel it is tiring??

haiz, lazy to explain to those fools.

they don't know at all , the others was lazy to be comparing like this.

but,i wont give up any chance to beat you.

challenge...it was started since small.

it's was ok for me at that time , but now , i m lazy to handle this kind of things.

i m happy and glad there is challenge for me so that i can keep improving myself , but for you, just keep pursuing my shadow, din't you feel tired at all??

pity.

Dancing...???..huh,i m exhausted, but fun ^.^

2009-06-16T02:29:00.000-07:00

learned my first dance....unbelievable.

at first , i m just try my luck to go there with my friend.

actually just accompany her.

but , at last , i m learn my 1st dance with my friend,haha^^

my 1st for most is dbsk-mirotic...

those steps are so hot , sexy (check the mv, it's really...)and hard to learn at first, but i try my best to learn it^^

and now i can manage it!!haha

this is one of nice experience i ever had before.

actually learn to dance helped me alot

like gain one confident , body language and dare to try new things! and i m the one who gain these benefits.

p/s : it also can be an exercise to diet,haha^^

this video taught me and makes me improve a lot to learn the dance ,try it ^^it will be fun

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUdNBv5GGPI

THE Smallest Cat???....hehe,cute^^

2009-06-12T17:25:00.000-07:00

i saw this , my friend emailed to me.

everytime , he send me this kind of email(forward email....lol)

thanks alot , it's very nice of you.

i share this with you.

i like it very much , as i also have 5 "cutie" at my house,haha.

last time my classmate came , he was frighten by this "view",haha.

doesn't they cute??

Prepare for Entering Uni???

2009-06-11T01:49:00.000-07:00

let's take a look what should we bring for?? i found this from some senior blog~~i 'll post it at here~hope it will use for all ^^

these are suggestion~if i m forget somthing in it, welcum comment on it^^ thx(it is in chinese if need translation , welcome to ask me)

迎新周需携带的物品：
1）一双舒适的包鞋，一双皮鞋和袜子迎新周常常需要走很远的路，穿袜子脚才不会痛（袜子多带几双，不然臭死你的室友我不知道哦）

2）长袖 Formal服装（建议两套）宣誓典礼和正式注册时（拍学生照）需用到

3）短袖 Formal服装（建议四套）能配领带的为佳（男生）

4）便装（建议四套）

5）拖鞋冲凉时需要

6）衣架

7）文件（正本和有签证的副本）副本建议每个5张Surat Tawaran, STPM / Matrikulasi, MUET, SPM（带正式文凭，不是Slip）, IC, Birth Certificate, 离校证书，等等如要申请PTPTN 就得多带父母各一份Borang Cukai Pendapatan (B/BE/EA/EC) 或薪水单或退休证明或其他可证明收入的信件，如：有村长或议员签证的薪水证明信件，还有大学指定银行的开户证明

8）个人照片，建议 10 张（记得拿最帅／美的哦）

9）擦抹尘埃的布空了几个月的宿舍，有多少尘埃可想而知

10）现金（建议 RM100）

11）药物，医药证明，特别病症的报告书以 USM来说，如果有特别的病症，需携带相关文件，身体检查时需带去其他大专来说，需携带全身医药报告，包括一张 X-ray照

12）雨伞在大学里，常需要走路，就算巴士也不会停在讲堂的门口，不然下雨就……

13）日常用品如肥皂，毛巾，牙刷，牙膏，洗发剂，梳子，厕纸

14）床单

15）手机充电器听说很多人会漏掉的

16）闹钟提醒没有手机的朋友，有手机的朋友就不必啦，那时我就是没有带闹钟，也还没有拿手机，都是靠我的室友的手机叫醒我的，呵呵

17）文具笔，尺，浆糊

18）水罐迎新周建议携带的物品

19）可随身携带的小背包能背的为佳，空出双手以方便做事，虽然大学可能会给一个包包，但可能是手提式的，会少许不方便，以个人经验，一手拿文件，一手拿包包，就没手写文件了，背包可以放水罐，文件，文具等

20） S字钩冲凉时用，由于宿舍的厕所很多都是没有地方挂衣物的，只能挂在门上，可是裤子挂在门上的话，裤袋是向下的，裤袋的东西可能都会掉下来，冲凉时都必须先把裤袋清空，因此，如要必免麻烦，建议带一两个S字钩

21）干粮尽可能携带不需要煮，不需要热水滚的，如饼干，面包

22）提款卡以防万一，如掉钱包，被打抢（所以提款卡建议不要带在身上）

23）蚊香或驱蚊器有些宿舍房间由于靠近草地，晚上蚊子会蛮多的

24）发束发夹，女性用品，化妆品裤带

开学后需携带的物品：
1）桶，洗衣粉（可到时才买）
2）计算机
3）指甲剪（可到时才买）
4）文具（可到时才买）订书机，剪刀，笔记本

开学后建议携带的物品
1）Multiple socket, 或extension
2） Jacket有时讲堂，礼堂会冷（可是有些教授的笑话更冷，哈哈）
3） Pendrive储存功课，笔记用，我们那年理科大学有送一个，128MB的，虽然容量不大，但已经够用了，那时我自己的也只有 256MB而已。但多带一支供Backup用也不错，有两份copy比较安全，以防万一其中一份Copy报销

个人觉得不需要的物品
1）帽子，日历，MP3播放器，hair gel
2）枕头除非你没有枕头就睡不着
3）手提电脑（很多学长建议迎新周不要带，过后才带）其实第一个学期不需要，如果真的觉得需要，第二个学期才带
4）饭盒除非你爱打包食物回房吃，不然是不需要的
5）镜子
6）餐具，杯和洗碗剂除非你有带即食面，或要冲泡饮料，不然餐具和杯都是不需要的
7）热水器就
8）热水瓶视个人所需，不是很重要
9） seterika
10）领带
11）被单个人觉得没必要，宿舍都蛮热的，怕蚊子的话可以穿长裤睡
12）马来服装，除非一些讲师特别要求学生在Presentation时穿，但通常可以普通长袖Formal代替

PTPTN OR JPA??

2009-06-11T01:21:00.000-07:00

NOW....

ptptn is open for online apply for the loan,check it on the official website.

read the instruction carefully~

it seems a bit fussy and many thing have to do~

comparing jpa and ptptn~

ptptn is loan

jpa is shcolarship , If one apply and get this , one will bonded with this group depend on what course you apply such as medic and other proffesion course will bonded 10 years (keep updating to the latest news)

for those student want to apply ptptn , they are not needed for open sspn account (telah berkuatkuasa mulai 18 mei 2009, according to offcial website ptptn).

please refer to this :

Mulai 18 Mei 2009, syarat simpanan wajib dalam SSPN sebelum layak memohon pembiayaan pendidikan telah tidak dikuatkuasakan. Pelajar-pelajar yang permohonan mereka yang telah ditolak sebelum ini kerana tiada akaun SSPN dinasihatkan untuk memohon semula sekiranya masih berhasrat mendapat pembiayaan PTPTN.

copy from : http://www.ptptn.gov.my/web/guest/anjung

for online applying this , one sholud plan and discuss with your family for the loan.after decided , go BSN nearby you house to buy PIN NO.

gudluck^^ for future undertaking

El-nino~~??

2009-06-10T06:33:00.000-07:00

El Niño is an oscillation of the ocean-atmosphere system in the tropical Pacific having important consequences for weather around the globe.

when i was wathching the news , i have heard tis new word~

confusing so check n find some informaton about this ~~

intereting to read n i m gained knowledge about this

"During El Niño (bottom panel of the schematic diagram), the trade winds relax in the central

and western Pacific leading to a depression of the thermocline in the eastern Pacific, and an

elevation of the thermocline in the west. The observations at 110W show, for example, that

during 1982-1983, the 17-degree isotherm dropped to about 150m depth. This reduced the

efficiency of upwelling to cool the suface and cut off the supply of nutrient rich thermocline water

to the euphotic zone. The result was a rise in sea surface temperature and a drastic decline in

primary productivity, the latter of which adversely affected higher trophic levels of the food

chain, including commercial fisheries in this region. The weakening of easterly tradewinds during

El Niño is evident in this figure as well. Rainfall follows the warm water eastward, with

associated flooding in Peru and drought in Indonesia and Australia. The eastward displacement

of the atmospheric heat source overlaying the warmest water results in large changes in the

global atmospheric circulation, which in turn force changes in weather in regions far removed

from the tropical Pacific.

copy from : http://www.pmel.noaa.gov/tao/elnino/el-nino-story.html

this phenomena in malaysia will continue until tis september( according news berita tv3)

i hope it wont too long as the weather is become much hotter than ever~~

Our mother earth

2009-06-09T08:38:00.000-07:00

不知不觉...

天空,聚集了一片片乌云..快下雨了,或者是....

上帝在哭泣?

人类的

所做所为..让他失望??

大地上的一树一花...

所有美丽的事物...

他的创造一点一点被摧毁...

人类生病,

找医生治病地球生病了,

它该找谁?感叹世间变化,是进步带来的不利,还是人类忘恩负义?

不得而知

Nervous-ing (^>^)

2009-06-09T07:18:00.000-07:00

wah~~

nervous + ing

waiting for upu result~~

mostly , now students who are waiting for the upu result have same feeling like me~~

(maybe) haha^^

the date for upu result will be relese on 19th june for 2009/10 batch entry

gudluck for everybody~~hopefully we all can get our favourite course

gambate^^

ques : Bilakah keputusan permohonan ke IPTA Sesi Akademik 2009/2010 diumumkan? Program Pengajian Lepasan STPM/Setaraf : Minggu akhir Jun 2009

copy from http://upu.mohe.gov.my/